Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Based on my sense of self, if I can visualize myself doing something, my probability of doing it is almost certain. This is a very logical thing… It is about the working method of the human mind and success.

Let's say I find myself with a 'strong' person; I have a sense of self that will enable me to portray myself while talking comfortably with the senior manager of a large company that I am considering doing business with. I'm at the company building, I see him in the lobby, and I'm instantly chatting. This is very easy; because with my sense of self, I can visualize it getting his attention and getting him interested in my work. Soon we are chatting.

But what if my sense of self was different? What if I saw myself as socially inadequate in the presence of important executives? Then I would just watch him in the lobby and not show myself. I wouldn't be able to get close to him; because I couldn't even visualize it.

We rarely do what we can't visualize doing. This is almost impossible. We can only do what we can do, what we dream of doing.

Who I am in my own mind determines what I do throughout the day. So if I want to be able to do bigger, better things, I need to start with my self-concept. It's about how I see myself. If I want to achieve more in this world, I have to grow it too.

I can realize any picture my mind sends to my brain of who I am and what I can achieve. When an opportunity arises to realize the picture I envision, I take action and do it. This comes very naturally to me. The sense of self is destiny.

Here is a way that works. Whenever you do something with a successful result, put it in the 'I Am' file. Let's say you have a great conversation with your client or you send an e-mail asking someone to get a training program, it's rewarding… Hold on to that! This is how you perceive yourself. Save this picture as the 'real you'; because you really did… If this is difficult for you, keep a diary. Write down the successful and productive things you have done and concentrate on them before starting a business.

To strengthen your sense of self, it is important to be aware that you are already the person you are meant to be. This is the most constructive starting point possible.

Before giving an important speech, review your diary. If you're going to have a conversation with someone to sell something that could have significant financial consequences, take a few minutes to freshen up and visualize who you are before you call. Move from fear to reality. Why would you make that call blindly and defenselessly? That's what most people do… Your self-confidence is always the first thing other people will notice.

Change your mind! Before every call. Change by doing it again. Check out who you are! Is this artificially empowering the mind? No, this is a fact-based thing. It is more authentic than the belief that you are defenseless and weak.

As real as a pianist rehearsing before a concert. No one blames the pianist and says, "If you have to rehearse, you can't play the piano very naturally." Everyone approves of the pianist's rehearsal. He spends hours at the piano so that he can play beautifully for us at the concert.

You can do this with anything. Imagine yourself driving safely on the mountain road and arriving at your destination on time. Now you can enjoy the road. It's actually a visualization you made here. This is a mind transformation that changes the world for you.

Steve Chandler – “Get Motivated!”

Source: Steve Chandler (2017) Be Motivated, (Trans. Bahar Akçura) Trend Publishing House, Ankara, pp.176-179

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